Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Brain Fart From A Recluse

How can I move forward
when I know not where I face
To clouded minds, all roads
the same seem
Mists of self-doubt, confusing paths,
disrupting destinations...
If only reason'd be my compass
hope, my companion
in this journey to find
my lover, Peace.
That I, at my hour
know I do not drift
into my dream wanting...

I have a very strange habit of whenever I have long weekends....or time off (haha dique...) I tend to become a recluse....I completely disappear off the face of the earth and just stay home, usually in some form of deep thought (even if some might not realize it). Unfortunately, due to what I tend to think about, I also become really restless..to the point that I cant even sleep O_o So I'll just be sitting in my living room all night...sometimes flipping through the channels, even if im not really lookin at anything...or staring off into space....or, even trying to collect my thoughts, although that kinda fails each time..haha...its crazy. This weekend that just passed, Labor Day, was no different....It was a 3-day weekend....and after saturday morning, when I stepped out for 5mins to buy some bread, I turned into the recluse yet again....bouncing from thoughts of life and the lives of my mother and father to checking out documentaries on the Beatles...O_o random, i know....Thing is, that apparently they're coming out with a Rock Band game dedicated to the Beatles....and of course, there's always a channel that jumps at this opportunity to play non-stop things related to whatever subject they can find...in this case..the Beatles. hahah it was interesting cause I found out that a lot of the songs I liked when I was younger...random ass songs Id hear on a movie or something...were songs that they sang O_O...

Overall, the only thing "positive" from all this, really, is that I finally opened up this lil book I had (that i hadnt written in since 2007...) and started writing again...I think I'm going to force myself to write...no matter how crappy or cheesy I think what I write is...if one, to clear up my mental cobwebs....and two...to get my thoughts out already.

Allow me to say it for you....."Good luck Edward!"

thanks! hahaha



Lorean Ashli said...

I can't keep journals worth a shit. When I was younger,I would only write in them when I was pissed off,lol.

Eddie said...

lol yea im like that too! i still wouldnt be able to....my "journal" is in my head :-P

la.moi said...

i won't tell you good luck, cause that has an undertone of doubt. you don't need luck to do what you are already good at.... but don't ask me what i would tell you, cause i don't know yet.